I want

I want to feel free. I am the one that holds me back. I am a clown at heart. Sometimes this is not good. I am able to smile though my heart aches. I am the one who laughs at the world. Does the world laugh at me?

I want to know you. I hide myself from the world. I ask a million questions. It is easier to ask than answer. It is easier to be on my own. Why does no one want to know me as much as I want to be known.

I want to be full. I am the one who feels empty. I want to feel satisfied when I sleep. I want to have so much to do that time does not exist. What will it take to complete my hollow existance?

I want to love. I want to be loved. I want someone to take my hand to to hold it close. I want someone to challenge me so that I smile during the attempt. I want someone to protect my heart. I want to go to sleep and wake up with someone beside me. I want someone to ride in my car and sing as loud as me. I want someone to stay with me a while. I want someone to hold as they cry. I want someone to share the joys of life with. I want someone to think of when we are apart. I want them to think of me to. What holds me back from going after what I want?

I want to be a winner. I don't want to cradle my hand as my heart shatters. I don't want to rebuild something from nothing. What reassurances do I need this time?

I want what I used to have. I don't want to be where I am now, again. I just don't know. What has changed from last time?