Everything we do is driven by a motive.

We may not like to think about it, but it is true.

Most of the time I act based upon the need to be accepted and the belief that I am not worthy. Okay, so I need to work on both of these things.

Not everything I do is due the need to be accepted. Some things I do because they make me feel good. Baking goodies to take to work is done because it makes me feel good. I have friends that I have continued to maintain negative relationships with because I felt that they needed me.

There are some things I do for the pleasure alone. Things like spreading a blanket out on the grass, laying in the late afternoon sunshine and reading a book. Things like warm toast and hot tea. Things like walking knee deep in the ocean with waves splashing my pants. Things like floating in a pool with my arms outstretched and my head tilted back so that my closed eyes are covered in water.

I think that I am going to start thinking about the motive for the things that I do... maybe this is a way to find worth and reasons for moving forward.