Well, time for a new tact. I am reading "The Surrendered Wife". Why? I don't know. Although, I think that there may be a heap of incorrect hype around this book. It does not seem (30 pages into the book) to be about surrender. It seems to be more about trust, and through trusting a partner. This then inspires/encourges them to be more because they want to be more to reward that trust.
I'll report back, but as I am a bit of a control freak, I believe that I need to trust more. Time will tell.